Just like a pair of earrings can solidify your look, small home accessories can act as further (and affordable) hints of the interior design look you’re going for. If they serve a purpose other than decoration, all the better! Coasters are a great, cheap way to express your home style while performing double-duty and protecting your tables from rings (my cocktail table is glass, not wood, but I obsessively use coasters anyway so I’m not wiping it down twice a day).

So if you’re going for a Hollywood regency look, try some agate coasters, mid-century modern: marble or coasters made from vintage records, craftsman: Frank Lloyd Wright patterns, vintage: glass and silver, and so on—no matter what you’re taste, there are coasters to match. And if you entertain frequently and want to help everyone keep track of their glasses, slate coasters paired with some chalk are stylish and fun.

Coaster Round-Up by icelandicody on Polyvore.com

Now that Memorial Day is behind us, we have officially kicked into the summer rental season.
What? Your not renting a fab house this season? No worries, you’re a jet setter: chances are you have friends that are!
It is unbelievably important to review the proper etiquette of being a guest even if it is just for the evening or a weekend. I mean, you want to be invited back again next year, right?
Since you are of the jet set you are probably well versed, but even the most seasoned guest could be reminded of a few helpful hints:

• Promptly RSVP. Most invites these days are informal, via email or a phone call. For example, during a phone conversation perhaps your friend will say “Why don’t you head over to our place/rental this weekend?” It is important that you either confirm your attendance immediately or by end of day. Your host needs to know if the guest room will be taken. If not, then she can offer the room to another guest. It is very rude to keep your host hanging… and a easy way not to get invited in the future.
• Arrival & Departure. After confirming that you would love nothing more than to visit, be sure to plan your arrival and your departure, just like you would at any other five-star resort. This clearly defines for both the hostess and you what time to check-in and get the party started as well as when it is time to “jet”. Overstaying your visit is a big jet setter no-no.
• Hostess Gift. It is de riguer to bring a hostess gift to show your appreciation. Remember: they didn’t have to invite you. They could have spent a relaxing weekend at the house alone. Show your appreciation for the invite. After all, you are getting a stay at a vacation house for free. My suggestions for great gifts that guarantee future invites are:
  • Send a bouquet of flowers prior to your arrival with a thoughtful note “Looking forward to spending time with you this weekend.”
  • Candles. A hostess goes through candles like a drag queen does mascara. So buy a bunch of tapers and tie them together with a beautiful ribbon.
• The Routine. When you arrive start your small talk by getting familiar with the family routine. This shows that you are considerate of their needs. A gracious host will stay up until their guests turn-in for the night. If you find out that they usually go to bed around 9; then retire to your room at that hour and finish your NYLON magazine until you fall asleep. Just as important as bedtime is the morning routine. Inquire what time breakfast is so that you get a feel for if they are early birds. Nothing is worse than sleeping in to find out your hostess had breakfast on the table. Hate to break it to you; if they are early birds you should be too!
• Meals. It is important to give your hostess a heads-up if you have any dietary restrictions or preferences in food. You may find yourself taking a trip to the market with her, if so do pay for the groceries. Inquire if you can help in any food prep and if you are not taken up on it, try to keep her company in the kitchen whilst she caters to your needs. If you find yourself dining out every meal, it would be in good form to pick up one of the checks (I like to use my “bathroom break” to go to the hostess or waiter and give them my credit card prior to the check arriving at the table to ensure all is taken care of).
• Pets. If you are allergic, take your Zyrtec before arriving and leave it at that. It is so insulting to have a guest go on and on how allergic they are to cats when “Meow Meow” is roaming around. Please do not assume that a invite includes Fifi. If you always bring your Chihuahua with you wherever you go, inquire if Fifi is in the plans. Lastly and perhaps most important, do not scold or try to discipline your hostess pet; this is clearly not your role. If Spike keeps trying to hump your leg, demurely fend him off; I’m certain your hostess will be mortified and take the necessary steps to prohibit that from happening again.
• Your Room/Bathroom. Even if your best friend happens to be a trustafarian with staff,  MAKE YOUR OWN BED and keep the room tidy as it was when you first arrived. If your guest room is sans bathroom and you have to share a bathroom in the hallway keep your trips limited to 30 minutes at a time at most. Remember to wipe down the sink to remove toothpaste trails as well as any hair in the shower drain (this is a major pet peeve of mine).
• Be Careful of Personal Differences. Do not throw a hissy fit if the quaint town your visiting does not have a Starbucks. Deal! If your hostess goes to Church on Sundays mornings and you’re an atheist, figure out a way to keep yourself entertained.  If your host is vegan and you’re a carnivore…. guess what? You’re a vegan too that weekend! The hostess always leads…..
• Merci! We all know the importance of a handwritten note. Take the time to pull out your Mrs. John L. Strong stationery and reflect on a funny part of the weekend or piece of advice dispensed that stuck with you with your heartwarming gratitude.

The weekend will fly by, but nothing beats the memories crafted with good friends. They last forever.

Photo by Dilipkumar via Flickr.

In honor of the beau’s birthday today (happy birthday, honey!), and with his help, I’ve put together a list of  gift idea for guys. Because we all need help knowing what to get the men-folk (beaus, dads, bros, etc.) in our lives.

Tickets!
Baseball, hockey, a band he loves, basketball, some 3D IMAX flick you’d usually never agree to see, a beer/bourbon/wine tasting, whatever. Tickets generally go over really well, but keep in mind that when it comes to sporting events, if his team loses, it might end up being a bummer of a day, so make sure they’re on a winning streak or at least buy him lots of beers when you’re there.

Guy-cessories
A tie, cufflinks, collar stays, a watch… They might seem boring and traditional, but they don’t have to be. Find a super-stylish Prada or vintage Dior tie. Look for personalized cufflinks or something cheeky from Etsy. Collar stays are usually plastic, so a nice sterling silver pair in a chic box is a luxe treat. Scour eBay for the perfect, unique vintage watch (and cheaper than buying new). He’s not going to buy these things for himself, so now’s the time to get him something “nice.”

Media
DVDs, video games, a Netflix subscription, etc. may not be the most romantic, but if you need something for your dad or brother, this is a good way to go. Find out what gaming system they have or engage them in a conversation about their favorite TV shows and you’re no doubt going to find an idea.

Dress Him Up in Your Love
Denim, swim trunks, shades… If he’s the kind of guy that goes shopping once a year, chances are he could use a new something. Just pay close attention to what he already wears, check the size, and make sure to get a gift receipt!

Furniture
One of the best presents I ever got for the beau (this year, actually), is a mid-century tufted recliner with ottoman. A place of his own to put his feet up, sip some bourbon, and read

Art
This is a tricky one. Could go either way. This needs to be for someone you know pretty well… Maybe you even live together. Basically, you don’t want to give him something you would like to see on your wall and you need to know he’ll love it too. And when you find the right thing, you’ll know. If you’ve travelled together, check out my post on custom geographic flash card-inspired artwork.

Booze and Other Things That Are Bad for Him
Does he love scotch? Get him that 25 year old he always eyes when you’re at the liquor store buying wine. Cigars? Do some research and find the best for him. Since it’s just once a year, why not indulge his vices?

Subscriptions
Does he worship some obscure rugby team out of New Zealand? With shipping, a subscription to their fan mag might seem like a total splurge. A splurge he might not feel is justified with all those student loans hanging over his head. So treat him! And who knows, if he loves it, you can simply renew each year and then, viola, you’re off the hook for coming up with something new every year!

Electronics
Gaming systems, a dope sound system, a new iPod, or new iPod speaker… If you know he wants it, you’ll do good by getting it. When I gave the beau his iPod, I pre-loaded it with all his favorite music, a playlist I made just for him, podcasts from his favorite sports teams, The Onion, and LOST, some soccer game, Trivial Pursuit, and the final season of Battlestar Galactica, since I knew he hadn’t seen it yet and wanted to. He loved it (and still does).

Do you have any guy gift ideas to add to this list? Please share your gift ideas for guys on the OMFGstyle Facebook page.

There are a lot of theories as to why people find things funny. According to an anonymous Austro-Indonesian Pastor’s wife on the venerated site www.answerbag.com, humor or “humour” as she cleverly refers to it is “subjective”. While that may be true in Indonesia, and she might actually be a pastor’s wife (show me the ring), the fact of the matter is that in most cases humor is not subjective. The reason it’s not is that most people segregate themselves into groups of friends and acquaintances that generally come from similar backgrounds or have similar tastes. Friends are friends because they can, in some way, relate to each other and unless you’re the next Dane Cook (irony alert!) this tiny sampling of the population is going to be your audience 99% percent of the time. I got that number from answerbag, in case you were wondering.

Friends and like minded people will find the same things funny so my basic point is that if you tell a joke and only you think it’s funny, then the joke isn’t funny. It’s not that your friends can’t recognize your genius, it’s that your zinger about the kind of poops that old people take when they die just isn’t the comedy gold you thought it was. If anyone reading this steals that joke I will kill you.

So how do you tell a joke? I honestly don’t know. I’d like to say something deep about bearing your soul and exposing injustice but I won’t. I would define a joke as anything that anyone finds amusing and relatable. Even though most jokes that people tell are unconscious and instantaneous and you can’t really learn to be funny there are things you can do if you want to tell a joke:

Say something unexpected

Tricking someone into thinking you are going to say one thing and then saying the other is a common joke form. For example if you were to say:

Whenever I’m not feeling creative and need inspiration, I look into the eyes of a child…and realize how stupid they are.

That is funny, well not really, but you get the idea. You were expecting something cheesy about the unspoiled innocence of children and their incredible imaginations but instead: whammy!

Make Fun of Yourself

Another classic way to make people laugh is to apply your completely natural self-loathing to craft a hilarious knee slapper at your own expense. If you are someone who is sad inside, this behavior gives off the illusion of confidence and self-assuredness because people mistakenly believe that only the well-adjusted are secure enough in who they are to take the piss out of themselves. Unfortunately for sad clowns everywhere, this is not the case. The key here is to make fun of yourself playfully, and not depressingly. Here’s an example of something I wouldn’t advise you say:

I’m terrible at soccer…sometimes I want to kill myself.

Actually, now that I’m reading that I realize how it is actually hilarious and that if someone said that to me I would probably lick their face out of admiration. So I correct myself, if you want to be the life of the party just walk around tellling everyone that you’re thinking of killing yourself.

Be A Human Being

Nothing is worse than a sociopath. Tell jokes that show that you aren’t some souless monster that feeds off of orphan tears. With your new joke telling abilities you will be able to easily dominate the minds of those around you. Avoid this urge. With great jokes comes even greater responsibility not to convince the masses that you are some sort of all-knowing, all-seeing demi-god, so don’t do that shit.

So this is where your training ends and your new life begins. So in that vein, go west, be free, and tell that joke about your hatred of immigrants that you’ve always wanted to tell! Because if you don’t, then who will? A lot of horrible racists probably, but you get the idea.

So, as you may have read in previous posts, my beau and I just celebrated our ten year milestone anniversary. Since we never had the traditional wedding, we wanted to do something significant so we could finally celebrate this relationship with our friends and family. Initially, we looked into having a party in an event space, but simply couldn’t imagine spending so much money for an open bar and some passed hors d’oeuvres.

For that kind of money, we joked, we could go on vacation and still throw a party at our place.

Well, that was the lightbulb moment. So that’s what we did (and Mexico as awesome and totally romantic and gave me a totally flattering tan for the party the following weekend).

Since this anniversary party was the first time we were having so many people over (the final tally, I believe, was 37), and the first time we would be hosting much of the beau’s family, we wanted to do our house party right. “Grown up” style. And since we met on an airplane, we added some cheeky airplane references to our party plan that you can adapt to your own theme.

Now I want to share the cost break-down with you so you can be prepared for you next (or first) “grown up” home soiree:

• Custom postcard invitations: $35, including shipping (we had extras, which we turned into banners that doubled as decor)
• Stamps: $44
• Balsa wood airplanes as party favors, $30.50
• Custom stamp to personalize favors and napkins, $35
• Napkins (white cocktail), $7
• Glasses, free (borrowed from a friend and store owner who throws a lot of parties)
• Champagne bucket by Pottery Barn, found at this cheaper price on eBay, $79, including shipping
• Beverage dispenser by Pottery Barn, found at this cheaper price on eBay, $60, including shipping
• Liquor (4 bottles Cava, 4 bottles white, 4 bottles red, 2 bottles Jack Daniel’s, 1 bottle sweet vermouth, 1 bottle vodka, 8 six-packs of beer), $252
• Non-Alcoholic Bev. Options and mixers (lemonade, apple cider, tonic, natural mandarin sodas), $25
• 3 bags of ice, $5.25
• Snacks (50 vegan empanadas, 100 airplane pretzels and peanut packets, 4 dozen vegan chocolate chunk cookies), $170
• Custom postcard thank you cards: $35, including shipping
• House cleaning before-hand, $80

Total: $857.75
Full disclosure: I asked my family to buy the wine and beer in MA where it’s cheaper to save some money, but they wouldn’t let us pay them back, also, my BFF baked the cookies for us, so not all of this total actually came out of our pockets.

At the end of the day, we spent more money than we anticipated, but it was absolutely well worth it. Not only did we have a fantastic time hosting our friends and family, making memories to last for the next ten years, at the end of the night, we weren’t left empty-handed. Not only did we receive lots of fantastic gifts and checks, so many people brought wine that we were left with an entirely new half case. There were left-over empanadas, so we’re set for snacks and dinners for a while. Since the house was cleaned before the party, the next morning all we had to do was run the dishwasher several times and wipe down surfaces (it was a civilized, clean, “grown up” party, remember?). Also, now that we have the champagne bucket and the beverage dispenser, we’ll be set for sun-tea and future parties featuring cold drinks.

Over $850?, You’re thinking, Count me out! Don’t let this huge number discourage you—there are ways to cut costs:

• Send an evite and e-thank yous. Though not as personal or as “grown up” as something sent in the mail, definitely more cost-effective.
• Skip the party favors. However, if you’re asking for gifts, it’s nice to offer something to your guests on the way out. If we had wanted to cut costs more, we could have done paper airplanes with sweet/funny messages written on the inside… Be creative!
• Store the wine and beer in the fridge or the bathtub. Again, not as “grown up,” but if you don’t have the ice bucket(s) and don’t want to buy any, it’s an easy fix… Just make sure wherever you’re keeping it is clean!
• Clean your own house. I don’t know about you, but with a party coming up and a full work-week, the last thing I want to do is clean. Actually, even with nothing to do, the last thing I want to do is clean. And besides, I can’t do the work of a professional. BUT, it’s an expense you can avoid if you’re willing to do it yourself.
• Make it a pot-luck and ask everyone to bring food and/or liquor. A great way to cut down on costs, but not a good idea if you’re expecting gifts… You don’t want to ask too much of your guests.

Looking for party ideas? Drink recipes? Stay tuned or write to me at cody@omfgstyle.com.

balsa wood airplanes stamped with our custom stamp were favors for our guests

extra invites strung on twine doubled as party decor

No, not love-making related faking.  I know you might have thought that since The Holiday is upon us. But yeah no, I’m not really going to write anything about that. Not in, like, a bitter way or anything.  It’s just that I’m single and have no creative ideas to suggest, so go have dinner and some sex and shut up.

Instead, I’m going to write about something that currently matters in my life.

Bartending.

So I got a job on Friday at this bar  in Jersey City as a bartender, and well, long story short… I lied and have no idea what I’m doing.  I mean, I poured a few pints as a waitress at a college bar 5 years ago when the bartender was busy changing a keg in the basement, but really I have no business being behind a bar.

So what happens?  Well, they put me behind the bar! On a Saturday! And I didn’t burn it down! I survived. And I’ll tell you how you can survive if you too find yourself in need of any sort of gig but you’re scared you can’t do it cause you’ve never done it. You can! And here’s how via The C.O.S.M.O. System:

1.  Cram:  Dude, study!  I mean, channel your inner 16 year old and fucking flash card that shit up for a few hours before you’re to go in.  In this case, focus on the basics… the things you might have ordered back in the day when you thought drinking was special.  Margaritas, Manhattans, Kamikazes, Buttery Nipples, Lemon Drops, Martinis (dirty, cosmo, apple, pomegranate, chocolate, etc.), Bay Breezes, Sex on the Beaches, Washinton Apples…

In all likelihood, you’re going to be opening beers and making vodka clubs, but you should at least have a few frilly shits in your brain bank in case some douchebag tries to get fancy.

2. Observe:  Watch someone else doing what you’re about to do. Get there early, analyze the shit out of stuff. Watch how they pour and how much, scan the shelves and familiarize yourself with where everything is.  What can really slow down a rookie bartender is not knowing where the liquor is shelved. Photographic memory that shit.

3. Smile!  Stay positive. Do not panic. People are usually pretty understanding. Say you’re new. It’s your first night. “Bare with me!” and they do! Chat about stuff you do know. Recommend a delicious beer or cocktail that you enjoy… and know how to make. Joke, make fun of yourself, and remember, the set-up itself is symbolic. You stand between them and their poison. They need you. They’ll wait for you.

4.  Maintain Appearences! Yourself and your surroundings. You’ve been to a bar. You’ve seen bartenders. Now, look like one. It’s common sense. Ask people if they need anything, wash some glasses, wipe stuff down, go the computer and dick around for a few minutes. Just don’t stand there, chin quivering, looking lost.

5.  Own it. By now you should be feeling sorta okay. You’re beyond faking… you’re becoming. You’re getting better at something you’ve never done. Go home and lie in bed and laugh, cause you’re fucking brilliant and capable of anything. Even Au Capoeira, you lazy piece of shit, go take the class! (That was to me, not you.)

So there you have it. Hopefully this guide will help you through many an unknown experience. New jobs, sexy-time stuff you’ve never tried, karaoke? Be confident, baby.  Haters, to the left.

It’s the season for giving… and that means it’s also the season for getting. And that means it’s the season for thank you cards.*

Lists to make and check twice don’t only have to be for shopping; every year I keep a list of all the gifts I receive and from whom. After the holiday festivities have dwindled and I’m spending a post-imbibing day of “relaxation” on the couch, I take out the list and take the opportunity to say thank you to each person who has took the time to not only think of me, but also to spend their hard-earned money on me.

Never underestimate the power of a thank you—it will always be appreciated. There are many ways to say thank you, but although you’ve no doubt said thank you already, it’s also best practice to send a note, either by snail-mail or e-card (a plain email doesn’t pack the same pretty punch as an e-card). Some cute paper thank yous can be found here or here, but having pretty blank cards on-hand will also do the trick (and can be cheaper, as they might be sold by the box instead of individually). Alternatively, make your own with some colored paper and stamps or send a postcard. Rather do it for free? HipsterCards.com has some cute thank you e-cards, as does Rattlebox.

Thank you for reading! Now don’t forget to start that list…

*Actually, every season is the season for thank you cards! Send one to the friend who took care of your cat while you were out of town, the couple who had you over for dinner, the boss who gave you a promotion, anyone who gives you a gift or does you a favor anytime, really! Thank you is free (especially with e-cards) and you can never say it enough.

The holiday party invites have no doubt begun to arrive and you’re busy mentally picking out your outfits, planning strategies for getting from one party to the next in case two (or even three) happen to be on the same night, and wondering if you should bring a date or if you’ll meet someone there.  Well, ’tis the season to party, so follow our basic guidelines for holiday party etiquette and you’ll not only be the stylin’ life of any soiree, you’ll also certainly secure an invite for next year.

1. Dress appropriately. Jeans and a tee shirt aren’t generally considered holiday party attire. The invite might not say “cocktail attire,” but unless it’s a kegger at a puke-smelling Irish pub in Murray Hill, chances are your hosts will be dressed up, so show the proper respect and, well, dress appropriately. Besides, this is the time of year when you’re allowed—no, encouraged—to don bright tights, high heels, short dresses, and sparkly jewelry up the whazoo, so take advantage!

If you are as useless as I am in heels, you’ll want to bring a tote with some back-up ballet flats. Since this is the season for tiny clutches, stash yours in the tote while you’re on the road along with your host/ess gifts and anything else you’re bringing to the party (more on that coming up).

2. Proper party etiquette begins before you arrive. RSVP and let your host/ess know if you’re planning to come or not—it will help them better plan their party and they’ll be grateful. If you have to bail last minute, let your host/ess know via text so as not to bother them while they’re getting ready or entertaining their guests. Never call/text/email your host/ess the day of the party for any other reason; make sure to have all the info you need from them before the day of the party. Hosting is a huge job and calling someone for directions while they’re primping, plating, or greeting is just a pain in the ass. Don’t be a pain in the ass.

If the invite doesn’t specify, ask what you can bring when you RSVP. Which brings us to:

3. Never arrive empty-handed (either one of them). Always (and this goes for any party, not just for the holidays) bring one thing to add to the party/dinner (wine, booze, a dish) as well as another, wrapped host/ess gift, something for your host/ess to enjoy at another time (an additional bottle of wine or booze, a beautiful candle, or any other type of entertaining gift). If this is a wine party and you’re a beer drinker, bring some beer for yourself as well as something for everyone else.

If you can’t afford to bring these gifts, you might want to seriously consider not going. Basically, it’s the same as: if you can’t afford the tip, don’t go out to eat.

4. Mingle. Maybe you only know the host/ess and s/he’s busy in the kitchen or talking to long-lost relatives. Seeing guests standing alone and not joining the group is a host/ess nightmare and you don’t want to add stress to a stressful event. Be ready to make some small-talk with strangers. Introduce yourself, ask how they know the host/ess; chances are if you have friends in common, you might have other things in common too. It might sound corny, but preparing some conversation topics or questions (“How do you/your family celebrate the holidays?”) in advance could actually help break the ice.

5. Make a stylish exit. Say goodbye to the people you talked to/met, then say goodbye and thanks to your host/ess. Send another thank you via e-mail or snail mail within the next week.

Plan your escape before you arrive. You will most likely be drinking, so designate a sober driver, or get there via cab/public transport.

All of us at OMFGstyle wish happy, safe, and stylish holiday celebrations to all!